I was 4 when I started kindergarten & I had excruciating anxiety at the thought of being called on in class - yes I was that shy.  And like clockwork, come school picture day I'd have a big ol' cold sore on my bottom lip. After years of getting them I figured out the pattern - they'd pop out just two weeks following a stressful event. Just the thought of going back to school was definitely a trigger.  As I got older the anxiety & shyness never went away.  By 7th grade, my friends had either moved away, or joined other friend groups. All the way through my senior year of high school it was a survival game for me - just get through until I could make real friends, and feel good. I had been existing from just a little girl, up to my nearly 20 year marriage ending in 2013.  My parents, although excellent providers, were your typical parents of the 80s - there, but not really, and really just wrapped up in their own lives. I did have someone - my grandma was my person - the one who's love language was acts of kindness - and was my caregiver all throughout school.  She was the one who reminded me to take care of myself first, she never judged, and she was always there for me.  It was her who encouraged me to be my authentic self - whatever that looked like. It's because of her I tried to be a better, more loving parent to my kids. It's because of her I made sure to take care of myself and my needs first. It's because of her I know what self-love looked and felt like.  About five years after my grandma had passed away is when my world really started to shift.  My marriage of nearly 20 years was failing and I didn't have the capacity to try to save it, let alone save myself from the self-destruction I put myself through. I don't like calling it a mid-life crisis, but rather a mid-life awakening.  And the "awakening" really didn't happen for another three years.

Leslie was my therapist who helped me. I stumbled into her as I wasn't looking for a therapist. I was looking for a therapist for a friend. That friend found someone else, but encouraged I take the available slot instead. So I did. The only problem was her office was an hour away, one way. I told myself to give it a month, just to see if we were a good fit.  It wasn't until about session three when the magic happened.  Leslie was an amazing listener (as all therapist should be!), she took notes voraciously while I talked and then she'd give feedback, and homework to do before our next visit.  We called the homework "tools for my toolbox".  I had a lot of driving (thinking) time on my hands since she was so far away, and I coupled that with an hour long solo date at the cafe next door where I would sit, sip on a coffee and write in my journal.  The more I wrote, the more excited I got.  I wasn't really a reader, and until I discovered I was severally dyslexic, I actually avoided reading at all costs - but she made me want to read anything and everything when it came to psychology, neuroscience and self-love.  And I did just that.  I also decided to go to college for Psychology.  When Leslie 'graduated' me from therapy about five years following our first session, it was by far one of the proudest days of my adult life.  She gave me the tools to be the person I am today - and although I didn't learn everything I know now, from her - she gave me the tools to see my own potential, and with that - anything is possible. It is an honor and an absolute blessing to be here, holding space & guiding you while you go on the same journey I was on less than a decade ago. I'm excited for you to discover your true potential!  

anxiety, self-love & tools for your tool box

barely existing to finding my purpose